If there is a place where narcissists think they belong, it will be nothing else but at the top. However, this is not the case, it violates the notion that “every human being is created equal.” The very goal is to put every narcissist into the places they belong to, so we must open the narcissist’s eyes and guide them to their designated spot.
Here are the 9 tactics that could make that goal possible.
Number 1: Learning to manage emotions.
Narcissists target your emotions; they desire to extract any form of affection from you. They want you to admire and show love to their love-bombing tactics, or cower in fear from their outrageous outbursts. Narcissists long to take control over your emotions, and then eventually make your feelings control you.
Hence, learning to effectively manage your emotions is the ultimate way to put narcissists in their place. Even if it’s hard to do, once mastered, it makes you proactive rather than reactive, especially when dealing with narcissists. You can get narcissists the way you want them to behave; not getting any reaction from you makes them realize that they are not as significant as they think.
Number 2: Agree to disagree.
If you want to put narcissists in their place, never try to pick a fight. Instead, agree to disagree. Arguments are draining to most people, but it energizes narcissists. Hence, it would be pointless to argue your way against narcissists.
Agreeing to disagree does not mean you give in to the narcissist’s wants, it is just a way to simply tell narcissists that you do not want to argue about it and that you would not welcome nor tolerate any further arguments. By agreeing to disagree, you could indirectly tell narcissists to go on believing what they believe, and you will do the same with your beliefs.
Number 3: Exercise your right.
Exercising your wants the way you want will make narcissists let go of the authority they think they have over you. Narcissists believe that their rights are greater than what you or other people have when it is not. They even make you or other people feel obliged to obey their imaginary rules and standards.
Rights are something all people are born with, it is inherent to everyone, including you; all you have to do is exercise it the way you want to be exercised. This is similar to standing up for your opinion, but you also need to exert your authority as a fellow human being with intelligence, knowledge, and expertise.
Number 4: Use indifference at its best.
If the goal is to put narcissists into their place, then indifference is the best tactic to successfully carry it out. Indifference is an efficient tool against bad behavior, even against narcissists. Wherein you have to ignore, act uninterested in anything narcissists say or do, and avoid any other responses. These are just negative reinforcement. Worse, it might even encourage the behavior and make things escalate.
Narcissists, in particular, wanted acknowledgment and attention. They crave it. Withholding it is the best way to put them in their rightful places. Once narcissists see they are not getting what they need, they will stop and move on to someone else.
Number 5: Demand for change.
Ask for change, and express firmly how you would like the relationship to go forward. If you wanted to go forward that is, specify the terms on how you would like to be treated. It is essential to request a specific change in behavior. If appropriate, name consequences as well, and deal your cards on the table.
For instance, if the narcissist is continually late for your date nights or meetings, ask if they could show up a bit early, then say the consequences you have in mind if you do not see any change from the narcissist. Be prepared to negotiate. The idea is to get narcissists to their place by making them commit to change.
Read More: Words That Destroy a Narcissist.
Number 6: Stick to the facts.
Narcissists are great liars, their acts of superiority and all are nothing but mere pretenses. Hence, the best way to put them down is to speak the truth. Most likely, narcissists’ reasonings are either stuck about the past happenings or their delusions of the future. However, sticking to the facts will force narcissists to deal with a present reality that is so far from what they imagined themselves.
Dealing with the facts is the best chance you have in putting narcissists in the place where they belong. But facts are so easily clouded by the emotional distractions it comes with, a haze of ifs, buts, and maybes, so talk only about what you are supposed to be talking about. Never mind whose fault it was, do not blame yourself. Lastly, don’t be defensive or provide unnecessary explanations, just stick to the facts.
Read More: When You Ghost A Narcissist (Expect This!)
Number 7: Break the question to the narcissist.
Question a narcissistic person about their claims or opinions, and they will almost always back down. That is generally because they do not have anything to back up and support their exaggerated assertions. Questioning specifically why the opinions they believe as factual knowledge, throws them off balance. Simply because they are likely unaccustomed to being questioned, you do not have to be rude or confrontational to put narcissists in their place. It is better to remain tactful and considerate because this will further draw out the narcissist’s pretentious behavior.
A Book: How To Kill A Narcissist: Debunking The Myth Of Narcissism And Recovering From Narcissistic Abuse (A Guide To Narcissistic Abuse Recovery And Healing From A Narcissistic Relationship).
Number 8: Call on the narcissist’s behavior.
Narcissists do not consider the effects of their actions and behaviors on you or other people. They may not realize that you or other people find their behaviors inappropriate or annoying, or maybe they know it is and just assume no one will ever call them on it, till they go on doing what they are doing. Therefore, call them on it.
However, do not do it angrily, nastily, or rudely. Take the narcissists aside and let them know privately how their behavior affects you and the people around them. Publicly humiliating narcissists may crush them down, but it will also give them the chance to play the victim.
Recommended: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself- By Shahida Arabi.
Number 9: Open the narcissist’s eyes to many points of view.
There is nothing wrong with genuinely intelligent people who are passionate about their opinions. However, it is a different issue when talking about narcissists who think they know it all when they do not know that much, yet feel the need to treat their opinions as facts and force them onto other people. So, opening the narcissist’s eyes to many points of view will make them understand that the world does not revolve around them.
The self-centeredness, entitlement, and everything the narcissists inherently possess are very well known to most, if not all of us. Perhaps, some had even directly experienced its adverse effects themselves. Considering the narcissist’s personalities putting them where they belong is hard, but it is possible. We can attain this goal by utilizing the tactics mentioned earlier.
Read More: What Happens When the Narcissist Loses Control.
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