The Narcissists’ 3 Biggest Lies. This article will touch on 3 lies every narcissist uses in every one of their relationships.
As part of their need to feel superior, it is in the narcissist’s vested interest to keep you feeling down as a means of elevating themselves. We describe this pattern and focus on the single biggest lie they want you to believe. They take delight in it, making you feel poorly about yourself, but your commitment to truth can lead you down a much better path.
So today, we are going to talk about the three biggest lies that every narcissist uses in a relationship.
1. The first lie is all about how they present themselves.
They will pretend to be something they aren’t and, of course, you won’t know any better because you’re just meeting this person, you aren’t going to be able to figure them out right away. And the reason they do this, the reason they tell this lie is because on the inside, they are miserable. They don’t have any good qualities of their own, so they take on someone else’s qualities in the beginning.
In a lot of cases, you will find that they are mirroring your qualities and traits because if they were to approach you and be their true self when you first meet, they wouldn’t have a chance in hell, you’d turn right around, and run for the Hills. Does this make sense? Think about it, because if you are reading this right now, you were probably either in a relationship with a narcissist or you know someone that’s in one, and this scenario happens every time. I will bet that today, they aren’t anything like the person they pretended to be in the beginning.
2. Narcissists require 100% of your attention at all times.
The second biggest lie is that they leave out the part of the relationship where you need to give them constant attention; they need 100% of your attention at all times. I bet they didn’t warn you about that part in the beginning. And once they hook you in, their entire Focus will be making sure you are validating them on a constant basis, and they do this with everybody they are in contact with because, without that validation, they don’t have any self-esteem.
They need to have someone around them at all times, propping them up and making them feel special, just take a closer look. When you witness them around anyone, there are always trying to make sure they are the center of attention, and even if it seems subtle, trust me, it’s happening. The reason this is considered a lie is because they didn’t mention it in the beginning that they were this needy, clingy person. They conveniently left that part out.
We are all adults here, we all know what being truthful is; it’s when you were open and honest from day one about everything. And when you leave things out, when you fail to reveal the whole truth, that’s considered to be a lie.
3. The smear campaign.
The third biggest lie is the smear campaign. I have talked about Strategies to deal with a SMEAR CAMPAIGN in this article. They will create as many lies as it takes to make sure they come out on the winning end of every relationship, they just have to come out on top. They will throw anyone under the bus to make others believe their lies, and at some point, that will include you. You need to remember, narcissists always need to have validation, they need people to believe what they are saying, so those people will stand by them and support them.
They are always highly aware of the real truth, and the real truth always puts them in a bad light, so they have to make up scenarios or the cause of the problem is always on someone else; it’s never them. Because if other people see them for who they really are, they will have nobody to turn to, and the sad part about all this lying is, they will always find someone to believe them. There will always be someone out there that will Comfort them and feel sorry for them, there always is.
Recommended: Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.
So take a minute and think about your relationship with the narcissist in your life, or maybe you’re reading this article because you see a friend or a family member dealing with someone like this and witnessing these scenarios. If you examine things closely, you will notice that there is a smear campaign going on right now, and it’s not a smear on you, yet. The narcissist is most likely smearing someone else, trying to get you to believe whatever they are saying about that person. They are using you to validate their lives.
Narcissists are always doing this because they have to constantly cover their tracks. They have to make sure that when you start hearing negative things about them, they have their own made-up version of events, all lined up. Because if you find out the real truth, and eventually you will, the next smear coming will be all on you and how you were the bad guy and nobody should believe a word you say. When you really start to break down all these things, you will start to notice all these patterns and be able to escape these narcissists, or maybe help someone else Escape before it’s too late.
It’s ironic how these three lies all sort of tie in together. First, it’s the lie about who and what they really are to get you hooked, and then it’s the lie about the need for constant attention. They always leave that part out of the story until it’s too late. And then finally, the last biggest lie, the smear campaign. I hate to break this to you, but this is just the way it is with a narcissist, and until we are able to identify all these things and break the narc code for good, people will continue to suffer at their hands.
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Read More: How to Beat a Narcissist at Their Own Game.
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