When a narcissist loses control, the dynamics of the relationship and their behavior can undergo significant shifts. Here’s what typically happens when a narcissist is no longer able to maintain their grip over someone or a situation.
- Anger and Frustration: Narcissists thrive on control and manipulation. When they lose their grip, they often become angry and frustrated. They may lash out verbally or even physically, attempting to regain dominance and assert their power. This can result in explosive outbursts, confrontations, or aggressive behavior.
- Blame and Projection: Narcissists rarely take responsibility for their actions. Instead, they deflect blame onto others. When they lose control, they may intensify their blaming and projection tactics, attempting to shift the focus away from themselves and onto their target. They may accuse others of being the cause of their failures or shortcomings.
- Manipulation and Gaslighting: Losing control can trigger a narcissist to employ manipulative tactics in an attempt to regain power. They may engage in gaslighting, distorting reality, and making their target doubt their own perceptions and sanity. They may twist facts, rewrite history, or engage in emotional manipulation to confuse and control the situation.
- Hoovering: Hoovering is a tactic used by narcissists to pull their target back into the relationship or dynamic. When they lose control, they may intensify their efforts to regain the person’s attention and influence. They may use charm, flattery, promises, or even threats to lure the individual back under their control.
- Discard or Withdrawal: In some cases, when a narcissist loses control, they may choose to discard their target altogether. This can happen if they perceive the person as no longer serving their needs or if they feel threatened by their independence. The narcissist may abruptly withdraw from the relationship, cutting off all contact and moving on to seek new sources of control and validation.
- Seeking New Targets: Losing control over one target often prompts narcissists to seek new sources of supply. They may redirect their attention and efforts towards finding someone else to manipulate and control. This search for a new target may involve idealizing and seducing individuals who can fulfill their need for admiration and validation.
- Self-Victimization: When faced with losing control, narcissists may adopt the role of the victim. They may play the sympathy card, portraying themselves as the one who has been wronged or mistreated. This tactic is intended to manipulate others into feeling sorry for them and to regain a sense of control and power over the narrative.
- Intensified Tactics: Losing control can lead narcissists to escalate their tactics to regain dominance. They may become more aggressive, deceptive, or relentless in their pursuit of control. This can include spreading rumors, engaging in character assassination, or using any means necessary to undermine their target’s reputation and well-being.
- Isolation and Alienation: When a narcissist loses control, they may attempt to isolate their target from support systems and loved ones. They may spread false information or manipulate others to turn against the person they have lost control over. By creating an environment of isolation, the narcissist aims to regain a sense of control and dominance.
- Loss of Power and Identity Crisis: Ultimately, losing control can be a significant blow to a narcissist’s self-image and identity. They may experience an identity crisis as their carefully constructed façade crumbles. This loss of power can lead to feelings of vulnerability, insecurity, and even depression.
It is important to note that the specific behaviors and reactions of a narcissist when they lose control can vary based on individual traits and circumstances. However, understanding these general patterns can provide insights into the typical responses of narcissists when their power and influence are challenged.
Read More: When You Ignore A Narcissist, THIS Will Happen.
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